A Hygge Household

Happy Monday!

It’s a good day so far over in my household. I am LOVING this time change…it is my favorite time of the year! Between the sun going down earlier and the holiday cheer in the air I am one happy camper. When the sun goes down early it means one thing- time to get cozy earlier and I am all about it. As someone who is sensitive to bright light (and living in Southern California where the sun is always shining), I thrive on the time change where we get to spend more time in the dark. It’s time to break out the soft blankets, candles, hot teas, fluffy socks, soups, red wines, bubbles for the bath, and little twinkling lights.

Have you read, “The Little Book of Hygge?” Meik Wiking is brilliant and spoke to my heart through this book. Truly, Hygge is my love language. If you don’t know what Hygge (pronounced Hoo-Ga) is, it is a little book containing Danish secrets to happy living. If you haven’t read it, I highly suggest it. Plus you will enjoy the fun graphics throughout. Growing up in a Dutch family, we always called it gezelligheid, just like Wiking references in his book. We always loved being cozy and gathering together with blankets and hot cocoa. It’s a culture that I will always keep in our family. My husband even loves to be “cozy” now.

As an introvert there is nothing I love more than cuddling up in cold weather, under blankets, around loved ones and enjoying something yummy to drink and eat. If I could make a living out of this lifestyle, that’s exactly what I would do! This way of life goes great when hosting loved ones around the holidays- which are already in full swing (yikes!) Since this is my favorite time of the year, I am always trying to soak up every moment but it seems to go by SO quickly every time. In order to take it all in this year I am going to focus on being present in the big and small moments.

Life always seems to speed up from October to December with the friendsgivings, ugly sweater parties and Oktoberfests. So I encourage you to live up this season of Hygge and this goes for me too. Please share some ways you put Hygge into practice (or plan too) as I would love to hear what you do!

Xx,

Megs

 

Blindly Believing

Hey Friends!

Let’s get real today and talk about what it’s like to blindly believe something and not have a voice or belief of your own. I am so most guilty of this as I grew up blindly believing my faith, politics and education simply based on what my parents believed, said and did.

Now this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, rather, it was all that I knew and what I was exposed to. Ingrained in me were the morals and values that I hold highly now. Having been raised in a bubble where everyone around me seemed to be a clone (all looking alike, dressing alike and talking alike) I had to learn to think for myself. It wasn’t a passive choice, rather an active one. Multiple people have been placed in my life to help me tackle this not-so-easy journey. There isn’t necessarily a point where we just make the switch to not blindly believe, so at what point do we learn to think for ourselves? Maybe you were raised in a family that created a space for you to discover your own beliefs and value systems. If this is the case, then I would love to hear your own experience in the comments below!

Getting out of the bubble is one way to do this but it is so much more than that. If you just leave the bubble but place yourself right into another bubble then nothing changes. So what can you do to stop this cycle?

One of the best ways to do this is to talk with other people who have different viewpoints than you. It is crucial to follow these guidelines when having a conversation with someone in this position:

  1. Listen with an open mind
  2. Don’t get defensive
  3. Be willing to share your opinion and back it up
  4. Be okay with not persuading someone to believe what you do, but be willing to agree to disagree

Another avenue would be to find a mentor. Someone who can call out your flaws and present new ideas from different angles. I once had a mentor who told me word for word, “you need to get over yourself.” If the relationship and trust had not been established prior to this statement I probably would have called my mom and cried while playing the victim card. Instead, I took this to heart and had a light bulb moment that changed my life. I thought I knew everything and basically that it was my way or the highway.

It took me time and practice to be able to do this, and it is a never-ending process. However, I was in situations that also forced me to have to learn this (aka graduate school) and for that I am thankful. Not everyone has the ability to listen to other people’s opinions, process them and reflect on if you agree or disagree with them and why.

It is my hope that we can grow closer in relationship to each other as humans based on making this small mindset shift and stop blindly believing. If we can stop building up walls against people who do not think the same way we do I believe the world would be a better place. If we can’t come together and be willing to grow ourselves in this way, then we need to really sit back and dig deep into why that is.

Xx,

Megs

Meg The Introvert

Happy Hump Day!

I am so inspired today as I began listening to an Audible book titled, “Quiet.” Have any of you read it? I’m sure you have as it seems to be popular. To summarize, it is about being an introvert in an extrovert world. Part of the process in discovering who I am, has led me to learn that I am a true, yup you guessed it from the title of this blog, introvert. Although this has been a slow process, I am happy to be digging inside of me to better understand myself. That sounds odd, but it is not an easy task for me to complete. Often times I am better at understanding and figuring out other people, but when it comes to myself, I often get confused. There seems to be a trend among most social workers or others in the mental health community.

Now that I have discovered my introvert-ness (ha), let me explain a little further what this looks like for me. The word introvert, can be interpreted in many different ways. Most of the time an introvert has a stigma of being shy, nerdy, quiet, etc. And yes maybe I am a tad on the nerdy side but I am learning so much about being an introvert beyond the social stigma! When you first meet me, I do not seem introverted, but more on the extroverted side. I will admit, on different scales, I am not completely to the far left side, as I tend to lay in the middle but still on the introvert side. However, over the years I have become much more introverted than extroverted.

Owning this title was something I never wanted to do because it has such a negative stigma most of the time. But I am finally owning who I am and embracing that YES I need to have time to myself (daily) and I prefer being alone rather than being with people. In order to recharge my batteries, I have to be by myself. Being around people is great and can be very enjoyable to me, but it is also very draining. I can handle being in groups and at parties as long as it is not for an extended period of time and I can mentally prepare for it.

At the end of the day though, I prefer sitting at home reading a book or taking a bath (with a glass of wine or cup of tea), rather than going out. My husband is an extrovert (like 98% extrovert) on the Myers-Briggs test, so at times he has to convince (well actually beg) me to go out with him. We have a beautiful balance between the two of us…probably because I am an INFJ and he is an ENTP (on the Myer-sBriggs test) which happen to compliment each other quite well. If you haven’t taken your personality test, I highly encourage you to do so! It has really helped me understand myself and others much better. Here is the link if you decide to do so and it only takes about 15 minutes:Free Personality Test.

Along with enjoying being alone, I find that it is much easier for me to write my thoughts down instead of speak them. As a highly observant and self-aware person, it is difficult for me to shut my brain off as my thoughts run wild. Since I do not need to use that many words during my day, the thoughts get stuck inside my head and do not make it out…unless I write them down. I had a therapist ask me once what I was thinking in a moment of anxiety and guess what my answer was? Nothing. I told her I wasn’t thinking about anything. Turns out I was completely wrong and I was thinking SO MANY THOUGHTS at once that I was unable to identify them because they were firing off too rapidly. Needless to say that was not healthy. Writing down my thoughts helps to get the jumble out. Additionally, I cannot handle a lot of stimulation, such as, bright lights, loud noise, large crowds and bright colors for very long. If I am in a situation like that I need to go home and rest to recharge and usually I feel depleted afterwards.

It is almost comical that I did not identify this about myself sooner as there were signs here and there of being an introvert throughout my life. For example, I never had a big group of friends, but only a few close friends. Group projects were NOT my jam, as I always preferred to work alone in school or at work. Finally, I have always loved reading as it brings me into a place that feels like an escape, a different world, with just me, myself and I (oh and maybe the characters from the books too). It would have been easy to label myself an extrovert growing up as I loved to talk and I talked a lot (sorry mom and dad!). Also, I did not mind being the center of attention as a child and I was very opinionated. Plus, I could hang with crowds and make friends fairly easily but little did I know that I had it all wrong. I misunderstood myself.

Now I am embracing who I am and I get to share it with those who care. Thanks for joining me in this journey as I share about my experiences of who I am, where I have been and where I am going. I would love to hear any feedback you have!

Xx,

Megs

 

 

Finding Me

Hello!

I am getting back into blogging and it sure does feel good! In the past I was a fashion blogger (for a hot second) and now I am going to be focusing more on providing content that sets my soul on fire. There is something about writing down my thoughts that is freeing in ways I never knew. And as an introvert I sure do have a whole lot of thoughts going on all the time in my head that need to get down on paper. Can anyone else relate?? More to come on this.

A little bit about me, in case you were wondering… I’m a 27 year old and wow have my 20’s been full of ups and downs. Why did no one ever tell me that being in your 20’s can be so dang difficult?? I’m learning as I go and I finally am starting to figure out about who I am and stepping fully into that person. My background is in social work and I am currently a professor which I genuinely love. I am married to the most incredible man that I could ever ask for and a mom to two sweet little lop bunnies. If you follow me on instagram (@meg_theocintrovert) you will see their little faces and tails often. We all live in Orange County at the moment but I am open to moving anymore if an opportunity presents itself. I thrive in cloudy, cool weather and I’m a plant and candle junkie. My favorite way to unwind is with a glass of wine or a bubble bath or hey even both at the same time. 🙂

My whole life I have always tried to fit in with the crowds and yet I have always felt like an outsider. However, now I can recognize that it was because I wasn’t being true to who I was. FINALLY….after 27 years I am becoming ME. I’m ready to own it and you can take it or leave it! Any one else love the Greatest Showman? I am obsessed with musicals (another tip about the author) and the song, “This is me”  can change my mood in a split second to lift my spirits. Oh yes I belt it out in my car, at home and in the shower. But you might want to plug your ears because I know nothing about keys, tones or octaves.

The thing that means the most to me in this world is people. That is because I am a believer and I truly know my purpose on this earth is to be in connection with other beautiful souls. I’m so looking forward to sharing bits and pieces of my life with you, along with different passions of mine, in hopes that someone out there can relate or we can become friends based on similarities and/or passions.

Xx,

Megs